Society is not well-versed in recognizing the signs of codependency. The cultural romanticization of toxic celebrity relationships and a lack of awareness about addiction have obscured the signs of codependency. If you find yourself or a loved one prioritizing a substance abuser over themselves, then they may be codependent.
Codependency, in cases of addiction, also does more than harm the person suffering from codependency, it also harms the person whom the codependent person is dependent on. If that person suffers from the disease of addiction, it also sets the codependent up to be an enabler. It is a sad and common situation where both people only get sicker, while each feeds the other person’s problem.
The Signs of Codependency
Without the necessary insight, it can be very difficult to recognize codependency. To the untrained eye, it will often come disguised as acts of love. In fact, and in many cases, each party believes these are acts of giving and receiving love. That’s right, the codependent will rarely recognize their issue, meanwhile struggling to find self-worth, their identity, and their happiness.
When we begin to define ourselves by another, when our happiness begins to become dictated by the happiness of another, we are at risk of being in a codependent state. These are a few classic signs of codependency.
A common form of codependent behavior is caretaking. This happens when the codependent forms a “rescuer” mentality. For codependents, this need to “care for” and “rescue” the other person isn’t an option but more of a necessity. The deeper the codependent gets the more they will sacrifice to rescue or help the other person. For codependents in relationships with those dealing with addiction, this enabling drive can also be deadly.
Another one of the common telltale signs of codependency is people-pleasing. Codependents often feel the compulsion to say “yes” even when they don’t want to. The feeling of discomfort, anxiety, or guilt haunts a codependent if they say “no.”
Need for Control
One of the uglier traits of codependency is the need of the substance user to control their environment and in particular, the other person in the relationship. Since the codependent’s identity, worth, and security is wrapped up in the other person, control enforces and promotes that sense of safety. These are only a few signs of codependency but there is no such thing as a healthy codependent relationship.
Codependent relationships are most commonly found in the romantic arena, but they can develop in nearly any type of relationship, including relationships with family and friends.
Dealing With Signs of Codependency
The causes behind developing a codependent nature or codependent relationships can vary. With the help of a professional and experienced therapist, people can uncover these root causes and begin to work on developing a new relationship – with themselves.
Codependency is a serious issue, and it doesn’t get better on its own, in fact, it only gets worse without help. The good news is there is help and support for codependency.
Getting Help For Signs of Codependency
Many people struggling with addiction have either found themselves as a codependent or in a codependent relationship. If you are in a codependent relationship, are you struggling with addiction? Is the other person in your relationship dealing with some type of substance abuse?
If you think you might be in a codependent relationship, or if you answered yes to either of the questions above, there are answers and there is help. Contact The Ranch PA or call 717.969.9126 today, and find the freedom you want and the life you deserve. Start your road to recovery now.